I remember the worst day of my life (at least I thought it was at the time).
I was about 26 years old, maybe older and I had been out with a few friends celebrating God knows what because let’s face it, at 26 years old EVERYTHING is a reason to celebrate and you ARE always celebrating something. I had recently broken up with a guy, that I thought would become my second husband (I had been divorced about three years at that point) and that I would love forever. We broke up because he was an alcoholic but back then I didn’t know it as that because I come from a family of drinkers, well drunks really, who drank whenever they felt like it. If we were to have a family crest it would be a pink elephant with bubbles coming out of his mouth holding a beer in one hand and a low ball full of whiskey in the other. Both glasses would be full and spilling over the top with the mantra of “it’s five o’clock somewhere” inscribed on it. But I digress.
Being with him you never knew who you were getting, fun-loving Bus Boy (he was mentioned in previous blogs that has since been deleted) or angry, tantrum throwing Bus Boy. After the latter showed his face one time too many and resulted in me sending him to the hospital (defending myself – funny that cured him of wanting to play “drunk tag” with his fist), I knew this man couldn’t be in my life any longer or could EVER be step-father to my kids (I didn’t grow up in an abusive household, I’ll damned if I submit my daughters to it).
Even though we had been through A LOT, I still “Loved” this man. It felt like I couldn’t breathe without him, be me without him or be happy without him.
Over the months that followed I felt better and I prayed to God every night to ask him to forgive me and to not take this unknown woman’s child away from her (I didn’t know back then that God wasn’t like a genie granting wishes). I got over him a little more everyday. Since then I have met many, many men. Some were great, most were idiots and then one day I met TV Guy, and it felt like I had never been “In Love” before the day he walked into my life. He turned out to be a tool too, lol. But the point is, the pain goes away, someone else comes into your life that out shadows every other man you have every met. It may work out and it may not, either way God has a plan. HE knows where you are and where you are trying to get to. People are put in your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. The ones you want in your life for a “lifetime” may turn out to be the ones put in your life for a “reason” to prepare you for the lifetime folks.
Wish him well, pray his strength, forgive his weaknesses and let him go because you can not receive someone else in your life while holding onto him.