Monthly Archives: May 2011

in the mood for Italian…

Even though they have been getting a bad rap lately on shows like Sopranos, RHoNJ and Jersey Shore (those shows depict Italian Americans in the same awful light as RHoATL does Black women), I love Italian men. Don’t get me wrong, I love ALL races of men (I’ve dated just about every nationality) but I love Italian men for some reason. It could be for many reasons, a part of it has to do with me living in a part of Philadelphia that was primarily Italian American during my younger years. I love when I meet a first or second generation Italian American man who speaks both English and Italian fluently. Give me one that likes to go out dancing and can cook and I am hooked. I think I am having these feelings lately because I have been thinking a lot about a guy I used to date right before my divorce became finalized and I have been missing one of my besties lately (she was Italian American). Maybe it’s because I read Evie’s post about Spaghetti the other day. Whatever the reason I think I will be doing my shopping at the Italian Market for a while ūüėČ

Later Days,

-K

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Reality Television, smh…

It’s official… although the world didn’t end on May 21st at 6pm, television definitely did… it’s officially Summer because Teresa Giudice was screaming on Bravo. The Real Housewives of NJ (RhoNJ) has begun again. When the entire franchise began (in Orange County), I started watching with morbid curiosity (like a train wreck or car crash). Not to see how the better half lives (because they are soooo not the better half, they’re ppl that “fell” into money.) but to see what the hell Barbie Dolls did after little girls went to bed and turned out the lights. Turns out, they drink too much, start/get into fights (screaming matches) and spent way too much money on clothing. They’re the equivalent to a drug addict who has become a lottery winner. The shows were bad but still funny to watch. Now they are just ridiculous. Nee Nee from RhoATL has taken her show on the road by going onto the Celebrity Apprentice, smh. Then there is the new season of RhoNJ, which I mentioned earlier, is trasher than all of the shows in the franchise put together, smh. You have the Manzo Family which is the equivalent to the Cleavers. Then there is the Giudice Family, the are well… smh. There use to be Danielle “What’shereface”, she lied faster than a cat could lick it’s ass (and did porn tapes that were “leaked” online. Now you Have Teresa Giudice’s Brother and Sister-n-law (who looks eerily like Teresa) and Teresa’s cousin (shady bitch if I ever saw one). She’s sneaky and instigates like a school girl, all the while acting as if she’s putting “the family first”.

Watching the first episode for the season made me wonder why I ever watched. What it didn’t do, was make me want to see it ever again. It makes women look as if no matter how old we get we will always be 12 yr old girls looking for a Bestie.

Later Days,
-K

Help Wanted

Position – BOYFRIEND

Description – Full time position, Holidays and weekends are required (although not mandatory). Ability to multi-task, work well independently and a self-starter. Spontaneous and hardworking. Master’s Degree preferred but not required. Ability to speak up for yourself and to think outside the box. Knows how to prioritize projects and has a great ability to communicate. Candiate must be a people person and has to be good with children (especially teenagers and tweenies). Must have the ability to pick a good movie and a great bottle of wine. Position is very strenuous, so you must have great stamina. Must be able to ride a bike very well as this position also entails a LOT of bike riding (at least 4 times a week). This is a Partnership position, so you must be able to work as a team and understand that although you are a full partner you can be terminated, without notice, if the partnership doesn’t work out. Ideal candiate will have his own home and car. He will also need to be able to speak fluent Kayinease since the language is complicated, on the job training is available. Only serious candiates need apply.

I refuse to APOLOGIZE!

Hello my wonderful readers and fellow bloggers. I have been in and out of cyberspace dealing with my RL bullshit (I was going to say BS but I didn’t want you all to go searching the web trying to figure out what RLBS was, lol). Anywho I have been on a few blogs, some on my blog roll and some not and I have run across about 6 with apologies in them. Apologizing to their readers or some random douche, who happened to come across their blog, read it and not like what they’ve read. Then they post snarky comments or whatever, to which the author of the blog apologizes for offending the chicken shit commenter. So here is Kay’s PSA for FRIDAY (I might keep this up and make this a weekly thing. Not to mention it has a catchy name).

I WILL NOT APOLOGIZE! You have subscribed to my blog, you have googled, bing’d or dogpiled me to get here. These are my thoughts. In RL I use my filter. Here I don’t and won’t. If you don’t like something I say, fuck it. Move on to some other single woman’s blog, there are hundreds of thousands of them on wordpress alone. I really don’t give a shit. I am not blogging for my readers, I am blogging for me. I want to get somethings off my chest that I choose not to share with my RL, friends and family. I come here to be “frank”, to express myself and do it guilt free. If I meet great ppl here or help someone, it’s a plus. If someone else can relate to me, wonderful. But ppl who don’t, tough shit. I will continue to do so until WordPress shuts me down. So if you don’t like my blog, feel free to use the back button. You won’t be missed.

Later Days,
-K

Maybe I don’t come off right…

I am on OK Cupid and a few other sites, everyday. At first there was lots of interest in me but I think it was because I was the new kid on the block. Now, not so much. Yesterday, I rewrote my profile. I did come off a little boring. When it asked what I am doing on a typical Friday night, I said curled up on the sofa reading a book or watching a movie. Could I be more boring *in my best Chandler Bing voice*. I changed that to something stupid like, there is nothing typical about me – I know, I’m smfh right along with you.

I’m thinking maybe I need to put some new pics up. Some sexy (not naked) pics up. The thing is, I really don’t go anywhere except when I travel once a month and I haven’t done that since last August. But even then what kind of pics do I post? Any thoughts? For me, any pic that doesn’t make the guy look like a convict or serial killer is good for me but what are guys looking for? I have a degree in finance, I know dick about PR or Marketing. I’m not good at self promoting either. I just know how to be me. In my RL, ppl find me √ľber funny and smart. I get hit on at least once a day (mostly by married men or guys in a relationship). I’m confident and witty but how to bring that across in writing about yourself without sounding bitchy, sarcastic or conceited? In a conversation, even one through text/email/blogging, I convey this well but that fucking “About Me” section stumps me. I have decided that maybe I don’t come across well on paper. It took me years to master the perfect resume, so why can’t I do this?

I decided, a few months ago, that I was going to try speed dating because I come across better in person but what if I don’t come off all that great in 5 or 15 mins? (however much damn time they give you) And then GGD has me afraid to try it, she gave me a weird warning… she warned me about OK Stupid too but did I listen? The funny part is, I can/have been matching up couples for years successfully but don’t do too well for myself. Some matchmaker, smh. Well, I signed up for two different speed dating events and we will see how that turns out. I know the number one reason I really don’t meet anyone is because I don’t really leave home/work that often. I am here taking care of my mother or working until the wee hours of the morning, only surfacing to buy groceries, laundry detergent or cigarettes. I drive less than 10 miles a month. So I either gotta get my “about me” game up or get my black ass out the house more.

Okay, I’m going back to work…

Later Days,
-K

it’s getting bad…

I posted about my crush on Aldis Hodge
only for it to be thwarted by a google search and another search on IMDB (He was too young) and now I have a new desktop.
In case you have been under a rock (I am so clever) and you don’t know who that is, that is Dwayne”the Rock” Johnson. I have been having dreams about him for about two weeks. Two great weeks. One of the reasons I have been beefing up my guy searches online. Because I haven’t been for a bike ride in a while, the last one resulting in well you know… Anywho, I NEED a bike ride badly. So to keep me from making another stupid decision, I have put him up on my desktop to look at every morning and most nights (when I’m working late) he’s the last face I see at night.

All and all not bad for a relationship. Although we are still in the “honeymoon” phase, we haven’t argued yet. He doesn’t mind me staring at him when I get “blocked” and he is always around when I need him. Oh shit, I just reread that, I told yall it was getting bad, *hands on my forehead, head bowed smh.* I better go out on a date soon before something bad happens.

*sigh*

Later Days,
-K

I really wish…

I have been doing a lot of match searches on my profile(s) lately and below I have compiled a list of things I wish guys would do and why…

I wish guys would:

Stop using their “funny” pics as their profile pics – It doesn’t come off funny, if comes across as weird or sometimes even creepy. I am searching for a mature man, over 30. To see a pic of you that makes it look like you are eating one of your animals is just plain… weird. To see a profile pic of you in drag (because it’s your halloween costume) makes me move along. I have no problem with cross dressers, I just don’t want to date one. Since I have to actually click your profile to read the caption, Halloween 2007, it comes off… well not for me.

Stop holding up pics of their damn animals – Because of the way the pic is cropped you look as if you are molesting them.

Stop making their profile pics the ones of them drinking and every other pic a pic of them drinking – You look like an alcoholic!

Stop insulting women in their summary – Look you never know a person is nuts until they show you they are nuts. And News Flash, crazy ppl don’t know they’re crazy. It’s not cute writing down all the things you hate about other profiles you have read. Look it’s online dating, you are not ordering a pair of shoes online. You are not guarenteed a perfect fit, stop being so damned lazy. Take the time to get to know ppl, if you look at these profiles and think nope she smokes, nope she’s too short, nope she doesn’t have a college degree… you may miss out on a great woman. Also, reading in your profile “what you can’t stand” about women or what you think is “ghetto”, is really annoying. It’s like listening to you talk shit about your ex.

Men would say in their summary, I only want to date the same race or a specific race- It doesn’t make you a douche bag or a racist because you only date within your own race or a specific. I don’t have a preference for race, so to go through your whole damn profile, to find this out, well it’s annoying as hell. I have found a few that do specify race, I love it, it keeps me from wasting anytime on someone who wouldn’t be interested in me anyway.

Men would stop using group shots for their profile pics – This makes me think you’re trying to put one over on me. Why are you trying to make me guess which one might be you. I tend to be pessimistic when it comes to dating. If I have to guess which one is you, I going to guess the ugly guy.

Men would stop using the pic which makes their hygiene look questionable – Look, I think Michael C. Hall is sexy as Dexter (except for the mutilating ppl part) but he has a shaggy look about him on the show, you can really only get away with that look on TV or from women who have questionable hygiene.

Please, Please stop using chest shots as your profile pic – This leads me to believe you are a “Buttahead”, everything looks good on you “but your head” or that you are looking just to “hook up”.

I think that’s all for now, if any of you have anything to add, please do…

Later Days,
-K

I hate the first warm days in Philly :(

I am the Grinch who stole Spring when it comes to spring in Philadelphia. They sound of your first warm days in Philly are ATVs (4 wheelers to philadelphians) and motor bikes. Little kids screaming and hollering all day (today was longer than most because this is a week of half days with the PSD) and evening. The sound of basketballs pounding the pavement, loud music blaring out of open windows (both house and cars). People yelling up the street at ppl standing on the corners, Mother’s yelling at their kids to get out of the street, instead of walking their lazy asses out to the street and getting them. This settles down after a while, until school lets out and then it only last until July because by then it is too fucking hot to be out before the sun goes down. I can’t wait for July, smh.

Later Days,
-K

okay where’s Ashton Kutcher?

Am I being Punked?¬† I was on OK Cupid last night answering¬†some of their stupid ass questions (no judging I was bored), if you use the site you know that there are a billion questions added daily by the site and other users, so you are NEVER finished answering them.¬† No matter how many you answer they have a little box to the top right hand corner of your screen which¬†tells you that you have an 88.9% chance of being matched or in my case a 99.8% chance (yes ppl that is how many questions I have answered – funny how men keep showing up in my damn quiver that I have rated 1 star).¬† While listening to Weeds¬†(first season),¬†which was playing on netflix on another tabs. ¬†I was going through profiles and suddenly I get a message from a guy.¬† We talk for a while and I get curious enough to go through his profile.¬† He’s fucking 20 years old.¬† When I bring it up, he tells me “age is nothing but a number”, lol.¬† How many times have we used that line when we were young.¬† Forget the fact he is 6 years older than my oldest daughter.¬† Forget the fact that he’s 14 years younger than me.¬† The worst part of this whole thing is he is the best conversation I’ve had in a while. SOOOOO sad.

Later Days,

-K