I swear…

When guys are writing their profile they write it like they are speaking to other men.  OKSTUPID has a bunch of bullshit questions that never end.  They’re stupid as shit.  But I noticed when going through the guy’s profiles they answer all of the sexual questions but leave or fuck up the moral, ethical or thought-provoking ones (there are a small amount).  Not to mention the profile pics they use are horrible.  Everyone of them I see that have children in them, look like the children have been kidnapped because of how awkward the guy looks holding the child.  Don’t get me started with the ones that have animals in them…  P.S. Guys there is no way to hold a cat that doesn’t make you look gay, sorry but true.  The next time you pick one up, look at yourself in the mirror – gay.  The other pics that bother me are the ones in which they attempt to display their sense of humor (newsflash – girls don’t have guy humor).  We don’t want to date/marry the guy who gives dutch ovens, we don’t want to pull your fucking finger and posting pics of you on Halloween (at least I hope those were Halloween pics) with you dressed as Baby New Year, a leprechaun or zombie, FREAKS GIRLS OUT!  While we are on the subject of pics.  Please stop taking group pics, 1) we’re never really quite sure which one of the guys you are, 2) we almost always think your friends are hotter and 3)it’s annoying.

Please guys if you are reading this and you online date, feel free to post a blog telling women what we are doing wrong, I want to know.  I would love your input.  Hell most women, who online date, would love your input.  Tell us what we say that sends u running for the hills.  Let’s face it, when it comes to online dating, you really don’t get a second chance to make a first impression. You scroll through profiles, you see a questionable pic and then you click on it.  You’re reading through the profile and then BOOM, there it is the joke that doesn’t come across well in print.  The sarcastic remark that comes across as shitty or just stupid.  And that’s it, the person is gone.  It doesn’t matter if you are a fantastic person.  You could’ve saved orphans from a fire on you lunch break.  Washed the oil off of birds with Dove dish detergent.  Rescued kittens from trees. Taken those plastic soda can ring things off of a dolphin’s nose.  No one will know or care because of a pissy first impression.  Even Donald Trump would be left in cyber space if you didn’t know he was.  Could you imagine his profile? His headline would read “I make millions firing ppl for a living and I might run for President.”

So guys don’t take this post as a kick in the nads.  Just some good advice.  If you have some for me, I’m listening.

Later Days,



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