Ok, last we spoke, we were talking about the Mechanic. I told you about my red flags, since posting I haven’t seen him and he has chosen only to communicate to me via text. When I was dating a married man in my early twenties (don’t judge), he said something that still rings in my ears every time a man chooses to communicate primarily or only through text.
She can’t hear what I don’t say…
Anywhosal since we haven’t had a chance to speak face to face since last week, I decided to do a little fishing, he sent me a good morning text, it had an apology in it because he was supposed to call last night around 8ish. He told me he fell asleep. So I loaded up my fishing rod with this little gem, “It’s cool, I never expect to hear from you in the evening.” I wanted to see what kind of fish I would hook. I had my fingers crossed for none but instead I got a whopper. It said something along the lines of “not cool”. I asked him what he got out that text, he sent back, He got that I was trying to say he was “hiding a wife and kids some where” and if I “have a question just ask.” I blew it off with something breezy like “not the case” I know you have other obligations, blah, blah, snore. After which I asked what he was doing with the rest of his week because “I would like to see you”. He says “will do”. It’s friggin Wednesday, who doesn’t know what they’re doing Thursday and Friday on Wednesday? Now what pops into my head is the episode with George, from Seinfeld, screening his calls because he knows the woman he’s dating is going to dump him. Resulting in him sending Kramer on a date in his place, the woman asks Kramer to pass the “Break up message” along to George, allowing her to dump George by Proxy. I think he knows this conversation is coming, but since I sent that little text and his response, it now allows me to open up the conversation without being confrontational or seeming like I’m paranoid. Good lawyers do it in court all the time to allow evidence to be admitted that normally would be outside the purview of an argument. The next time we go out, I’m going to tell him his response to my “innocent” text bothered me. I made a
harmless comment and he went way out left field, what’s that all about? I know it’s passive aggressive, I know but I like this guy and I don’t want to accuse him of anything that may but a strain on a budding relationship. That kind of thing puts a dark cloud over a relationship that never goes away. Say you and your boyfriend met and slept together while you were still in another relationship with someone else, for your entire relationship with your new boyfriend, every time he doesn’t answer his phone, doesn’t respond to a text or he’s “hanging out” you’re wondering if he’s cheating on you too, even if he has been nothing but faithful since you started a monogamous relationship. I don’t want that kind of cloud following me, even if we just end up being friends.
We shall see what happens and I will keep you posted.
Love and Later Days.