Category Archives: Clubbing

Put on a damn shirt!!!

I’m tired of the shirtless selfie profile pics. I know guys are trying to grab attention but as my mother use to tell my sister and I, use your words.  Maybe in my twenties it might have grabbed my attention but now, I’m a grown ass woman. Show me that you can talk to me, that if we’re together I wanna know we aren’t gonna be watching cartoons and reality shows, eating McDonalds on a sofa supported by crates because you spend all ur money on weights, weed and supplements.

Send me a great guy, nice smile, and good job.  Respectful, not in a relationship who lives alone, preferably with grown kids who live in their own homes.  He should be able to carry a conversation but not be uncomfortable with silence. He’s able to be around strangers (because I like to travel and throw dinner parties) I want someone who can go out or stay in like to wear jeans or a tux. I don’t think that’s much to ask for, do you. I also need him to either like his job or be indifferent to it because I don’t want him bitching about his job every time we get together.

Okay, I think I’m done.

Love and Later Days,

-K

WHY?

This a list of questions I have for men about online dating…

Why do…

You have a picture of you and your ex (or any woman for that matter) As your profile pic? Am I supposed to call this chic for a character reference? Is it a proof of life pic, to let me know you don’t have her duct taped in your basement?

You have a pic of your favorite sports teams logo for your profile pic? Do I get to pick between you and the teams starting line up? Well they be financing our dates?

You have a pic of your kids or your animals as your profile pic? It doesn’t make you appear more sensative, it makes you look either creepy or like you don’t want me to know what you look like.

You have a blank profile?

You have a group photo as a profile pic? (ever notice that it’s never the guy you think it is in the group shot).

You look at my profile 20,000 times and never send an email?

You “wink” and then never respond to my emails?

Your first text/email to me ask for a sexy pic? Do I look like I’m 16 and in high school? I’m a grown ass woman, my breed doesn’t send sexy pics and we damn sure don’t send them to ppl we don’t know or just met online.

I think that’s it, lol.

Love and Later Days,

-K

Guess who’s back…

Hey! Missed me? I missed you.  I have been away but thinking of you all.  I have a few weeks left in Philly, thank God because any longer and I would make the damn news.  I have been pretty much avoiding ppl over the last few weeks. Mainly because a lot of folks like to piss in my Cheerios. I have been asked about three times today where I will be staying, as soon as I say 2 blocks from the beach someone is quick to point out Hurricane season. Even someone who is supposed to be happy I’m coming to SC.

Anywhosal, I have done it.  I have reactivated my Okcupid and Match.com accounts.  Not hoping to meet Mr. Right.  I just haven’t met anyone new in about a year.  I would like to just go out on a couple of dates. Get my feet wet.  I want to put on my makeup. Do my hair. Have a door held for me, my cigarette lit.  I get tired of being treated like a girl, that’s a friend instead of a girlfriend.  I know it’s my fault because I have always been comfortable with guys and it’s real easy to let my inner tomboy come out whenever I feel comfortable with a guy I like…  I have been working on it.  One of the ways I will be combating my inner tomboy is by buying some new lingerie. Hard to feel like a tomboy with a silk and lace covered thong going up your butt, lol.  I’m not saying I plan on playing any games or pretending to be something I’m not, I’m just saying I want the guys I’m going out with (yes I said guys, plural, more on that later) to get to know me before I start spewing off NFL facts and stats.

Dating:
Kay’s rules for dating. I don’t believe in dating one person at a time. It’s easy to get wrapped up in a person and force feelings on someone, if they’re the only person you’re seeing.

I don’t believe in lying about dating more than one person. However, I normally only bring it up if he asks.

I don’t believe in monogamous relationships unless we have both agreed to it, discussed and decided it’s what we both want. He has to know that getting into a long term relationship with me means you intend to marry me one day. Otherwise what’s the point? Why not continue to date? Because you don’t want me sleeping with any other man? News flash, it doesn’t work. Why jump from one relationship to the next? We get together and stay together until one of us gets bored. No thanks.

So, I put myself back on the market. Looking through match.com’s line up before I decide whether I will be paying for a membership.  I really think I won’t pay until next month when I’m completely relocated. I want to go to their mixers and “stirs” (I think they call them) which will be difficult here in Philly since I’m registered with my zip code in SC.  I figure since I’m paying extra for that feature, I want to use it. I think I will do better with those features anyway because I come off better in person than I do online anyway. I want to put on a pretty dress, dangling earrings,some high heels and drink some colorful cocktails, while holding a pretty clutch bag. Even if I don’t meet anyone, I will be outside! No talk about medications, school, bickering between two teenagers, no talk of moves, nada. Just me being a grown up.

Looking forward to it…

Love and Later Days,

-K

Deleting old profiles…

I have a profile on Match.com and Okcupid.com (I lied a little on okcupid and said I already live in Myrtle Beach because I thought I would be there by now). Anywhosal, I have decided to take them both down for the time being.  I’ll put them both up again after the move.  Well, maybe… Idk if I want to go back to OKCupid, there isn’t too much variety.  In the meantime, I will be drafting my new profile. I also need to check out this bar I heard about online. This place supposedly has two sister bars and you can become a member. After you pay a small fee, there isn’t (supposed to be) any cover charge and your VIP service is included in all three bars. Sounds promising but I worked in Sports and Entertainment, most of the time when there are promotions and memberships involved, it’s usually because an item or product isn’t moving well and they use memberships and promotions as a way of making you feel special and like you’re missing something, boost sales and make whatever product or event seem more “top shelf” than it actually is… So they could be doing the membership thing to get more folks in their bars/clubs not just because they would value me as a customer.  A few trips should tell me all I need to know. If everything checks out, it’ll be a great way to meet new folks, primarily open up my dating pool.

Myrtle Beach, like Philly, is a tourist spot because of this during the Summer months I will probably go out more because of the ppl who come from all over the US to golf and the guys who come down for bike week. That’ll open up the dating pool some. Not looking to meet Prince Charming anytime soon, just be around men again, hell adults again and not discuss medicine or what my kids are up to, no boy crazy stuff or anything about anime.

I am closing in on my 6 week mark and trying to pray more and worry less. I go to bed at night trying to just focus on one thing at a time, so far so good. I haven’t had a need to have alcohol induced sleep in a week.  When I get anxious like this I could go days without sleep unless I have a couple of shots first.  I remember one move a few years back had me so anxious I was afraid I might need to go to AA after I returned the Uhaul truck, Smh.  That’s all for now.

Love and Later Days,

-K

Speed Dating update…

Funny how things work out. I went to my speed dating event and noticed right away that it seem… off. The bar it was being hosted in was way too small to have 10 to 30 singles as the ad boasted. The other thing was there were on 6 ppl there including me. I figured there was an upstairs or downstairs where the event was being hosted. After my niece arrived (my wingman for the night.) I inquired about the event. When I told the barmaid why I was there, she looked confused. Apparently the event stopped being held at that location months ago. She asked was I sure the email was for yesterday and not an old one. I showed her the email and she just shrugged, let me tell u, I am so glad I didn’t register in advance like the email requested. I would have been out of 50 bucks (it was 24.99 per person).

So after a few cocktails, my niece and I take a stroll down South Street to check out the happenings. We end up at a hotel bar and guess what I met the nicest guy. After a few more cocktails we head down to a local nightclub. Drink some more and my niece leaves me alone with NG. After I crash a bachelorette party, stealing two boas and remembered just in time that I was a klutz. That prevented from taking a trip to the emergency room because just beforehand I was considering doing a pole climb on this stripper pole in the night club.

I had good night and NG put me in a cab after giving me a good night kiss. I spent today texting him on and off. So, I didn’t meet anyone during the scam speed dating event but I did meet a groovy guy (yeah I said groovy). Did I mention he doesn’t live in Philly? He lives in NC, about an hour from Myrtle Beach. For now I don’t have to worry about the relocation conversation I was worried about before, at least not with this guy. He comes to Philly often and says he wants to see me when he’s in town.

For today, I’m happy and that’s all I can ask for because tmrw’s not promised.

Love and Later Days,

-K

T minus 5…

Okay I have five hours before this thing and I’m hoping it isn’t a mess. Everytime I have gotten excited about something in the past few years it turned out to be a bust. Anything that has had anything to do with men, that is…

I know I’m not sending out desperate or low self-esteem vibes because I not desperate and if I were sending out low self-esteem vibes, well men would be flocking to me like flies to shit.  Maybe it’s where I’m going? When I went to AC the guys were definitely younger and were real “pump your fist” type guys. Idk, I guess we’ll have to wait and see…

Love and Later Days,

-K

Day 3…

I was honestly thinking I would wake up sore from doing an hour of Zumba yesterday but I felt okay. Doing it again tonight but only for 40 minutes.

For those of u who are sick of me talking about me trying to lose these 20 or 30 lbs, here is some of what u signed up for… I’m going to be doing Speed Dating on Wednesday, that is, if my sister shows up. We haven’t spoken since last Monday and she has yet to answer text about her availability on Wednesday (p.s. she hasn’t been here since my mom came back from her most recent hospital visit last Monday). She will probably pull the “Okie Doke” on me and tell me she can’t be here until Thursday but guess what the event is both Wednesday and Thursday, so the jokes on her.

Should I make it out Wednesday, I will post about who I may have met, if anyone… curious to see who shows up to these things. I plan on doing Zumba right before I leave because I feel so energized afterwards.

I will let u know how I make out.

Love and Later Days,

-K

Day 3…

I was honestly thinking I would wake up sore from doing an hour of Zumba yesterday but I felt okay. Doing it again tonight but only for 40 minutes.

For those of u who are sick of me talking about me trying to lose these 20 or 30 lbs, here is some of what u signed up for… I’m going to be doing Speed Dating on Wednesday, that is, if my sister shows up. We haven’t spoken since last Monday and she has yet to answer text about her availability on Wednesday (p.s. she hasn’t been here since my mom came back from her most recent hospital visit last Monday). She will probably pull the “Okie Doke” on me and tell me she can’t be here until Thursday but guess what the event is both Wednesday and Thursday, so the jokes on her.

Should I make it out Wednesday, I will post about who I may have met, if anyone… curious to see who shows up to these things. I plan on doing Zumba right before I leave because I feel so energized afterwards.

I will let u know how I make out.

Love and Later Days,

-K